The Real Difference Between Emotions and Feelings (and Why It Matters in Therapy)

Jul 19
3 min read

In everyday conversations—and even therapy sessions—people often say things like:

“I feel she doesn’t like me.”“I feel like I’m going to fail.”“I feel I’ll never be enough.”

But here's the truth:

These aren't feelings. They’re thoughts, beliefs, and assumptions—disguised under the word “feel.”

Understanding the difference between emotions, feelings, and thoughts is one of the most powerful steps toward emotional clarity. At SEVEE, we don’t just listen to your story. We help you find the real words—the ones that untangle confusion and bring healing.

What Are Emotions?

Emotions are your body’s fast, automatic, and instinctive response to what’s happening right now.They’re not chosen. They just happen.

They are:

Biological
Universal (everyone feels them)
Physical (you feel them in your body)

Examples of emotions:😨 Fear, 😠 Anger, 😢 Sadness, 😍 Joy, 😮 Surprise, 😖 Disgust

They rise and fall quickly, often within seconds or minutes.

Think of emotions as your body’s built-in alarm system.

What Are Feelings?

Feelings are what happen after the emotion hits.They’re how your brain interprets those physical sensations and assigns meaning.

They are:

Conscious
Mental + Emotional
Shaped by past experiences and personal context

Examples of feelings:Hurt, peaceful, rejected, anxious, hopeful, lonely

Feelings last longer than emotions—and they can be named, talked about, and explored in therapy.

Feelings are the mind’s way of understanding the body’s signals.

The post also includes a watercolor-style illustration of the 5 elementary emotions—Fear, Anger, Sadness, Joy, and Disgust—

Then What Are Thoughts?

Thoughts are mental constructions—beliefs, judgments, assumptions, and narratives.

But here's where most people blur the lines:

We say "I feel" when we're actually thinking something.

❌ “I feel she doesn’t like me.”

✅ “I think she doesn’t like me, and that makes me feel anxious.”

❌ “I feel like quitting.”

✅ “I’m thinking of quitting because I feel exhausted.”

The moment you use “I feel” to describe a belief or judgment, you’re stepping into thought territory—not emotional truth.

Why This Matters (Especially in Therapy)

When you mistake a thought for a feeling, therapy gets stuck.

You stay in your head, repeating the same mental loop—without ever touching the real emotion underneath.

But when you pause and name your true feeling...

“I feel rejected.”“I feel afraid.”“I feel exhausted.”“I feel invisible.”

...that’s when you begin to heal.

At SEVEE, we help you pause, feel, and name. Because that’s how clarity is born.Not by fixing the noise—but by listening underneath it.

A Simple Table to Understand

🔍 Element	⚡ Emotion	🧠 Feeling	💭 Thought
What it is	Body’s raw response	Meaning of the emotion	Mental judgment or story
Comes from	Instinct (brainstem)	Interpretation (limbic system)	Beliefs (thinking brain)
Duration	Short-lived	Lasts longer	Can repeat in loops
Examples	Fear, anger, joy	Hurt, anxious, calm	“I’m not enough”, “She’s judging me”
Verbal Clarity	“I feel scared.”	“I feel nervous.”	“I think she hates me.”

Everyday Misuse of "I Feel" (And the Truth Beneath)

We all do it. Here are some of the most common misused “I feel” statements—and how to say them with clarity:

❌ Misused Statement	✅ Emotionally Clear Version
I feel she doesn’t like me.	I think she doesn’t like me. I feel anxious.
I feel I’m not good enough.	I tell myself I’m not enough. I feel ashamed.
I feel like giving up.	I can’t see hope right now. I feel hopeless.
I feel he’s using me.	I believe he’s using me. I feel hurt and confused.
I feel like I’m being judged.	I assume they’re judging me. I feel insecure.
I feel stupid.	I judge myself. I feel embarrassed and small.
I feel like I don’t belong.	I think I don’t fit in. I feel lonely.
I feel like a failure.	I believe I’ve failed. I feel ashamed.
I feel like no one cares.	I notice lack of response. I feel neglected.
I feel she’s lying to me.	I suspect she’s hiding something. I feel uneasy.
I feel like I’m annoying.	I fear being too much. I feel anxious.
I feel like quitting.	I am thinking of quitting. I feel emotionally drained.
I feel like everyone is better.	I compare myself often. I feel inadequate.
I feel like I’m failing.	I worry I’m not doing enough. I feel scared.
I feel like they’re laughing at me.	I believe they’re mocking me. I feel humiliated.